My Bracket Making a Comeback Like MacArthur in the Phillipines

My bracket got beat up and knocked down in the first five rounds of this NCAA tournament, but is now making a comeback on the badassery scale of General MacArthur circa 1945. My bracket never declared "I will return" when it left the Phillipines before kicking Japanese ass to comeback, but it's kinda like that.

The Final Four teams have been determined and in an unlikely turn of events, only a single number one seed is still around. Early on, my bracket was getting battered like McDonald's filet of (substitute) fish. I was in last place in my group, looking like I wasn't going to be able to get back up off the mat. But then a chain of events so stunning led me back into the top ten and into the running for first place - in fact, I'm tied for the most available remaining points possible. Those events? The stunning upsets of the number one seeds Kansas, Kentucky, and Syracuse.

I now stand as the only bracket with 50% of the final four correct with Duke and West Virginia meeting on the right side of the Final Four. Thanks to stunning upsets and early bomb outs from the likes of Saint Mary's, Butler, etc I've stubmled ass-backwards into a three horse race with two other Duke selectors. I'm just glad to be out of the cellar and back into the competition!

Duke will take on West Virginia while Butler plays Michigan State. I the first game, I like the Blue Devils - WVU thrives on their outside shooting, in fact in their last game, all their first half points came on three-pointers. I see Dukes scramble and shift defense contesting each and every 3-ball that the Mountaineers put up. I believe each WVU shooter will have a hand in his face as he releases the ball, that's just the way Duke plays D - annoying and in your face constantly. In the other matchup I like Michigan State to take out Butler. Coach Izzo has a knack for showing up come tourney time, and this year is no different. He somehow gameplans the perfect strategy and turns his mediocre team into gametime stars. If those two games play out, I foresee Duke winning it all - their team is just too mature and experienced to be overtaken by the Spartans.

Perpetuate Internet Rumor? If it Involves Olivia Wilde and Freida Pinto - I'm In!

Hotties-of-all-trades, Olivia Wilde and Freida Pinto, have been rumored to be in the next James Bond film by none other than super-reliable British tabloid magazines. Because it's just a rumor, and I have a blog-thing, I assume it's my sworn duty to perpetuate these wild allegations that have no evidence of being true. I think this kind of rumor mongering was part of the terms and conditions I had to sign to have a blog...

James Bond is on it's 23rd film (official film that is) and as always, two unbelievable hotties will be cast alongside the film's star, Daniel Craig. Of course, no director has even been chosen yet and both agents for these actresses have vehemently denied even being contacted about the roles, let alone being in negotiations already. "I would like to confirm that as of today, Freida Pinto has not been approached to be part of the next ‘Bond’ film,” said Pinto’s spokesperson. “It is of course very flattering to even be rumoured to be part of a Bond film but she has certainly not been approached for the role of the next Bond girl opposite Daniel Craig as yet.” Both Freida and Olivia fall into the category or dark, mysterious, hot babe - and so could easily be plugged into a James Bond script.

Freida is famous for her role in Slumdog Millionaire and Olivia was in Year One, several appearances on House, and upcoming release, Tron Legacy. Olivia is rumored to be playing “a double-crossing UN worker based in Afghanistan” in the film. I would love to see both of them in a Bond movie, it'd be undeniable badassery all around. I am throwing my full support behind this motion. Now some more pictures.

NFL Changes Overtime Policy, Only During Playoffs, After 9PM, Waxing Moon Phases

NFL owners have just voted to change the rules governing overtime in professional football. Calm down, Donovan McNabb, you can still tie games! The only difference is that now instead of sudden death overtime, the NFL will feature not quite sudden death overtime. But only in the playoffs, and only during the waxing moon of the seventh house of Aquarius.

In recent memory, NFL games that are tied at the end of the game go into a sudden death overtime period. Whoever is first to score, wins the game. Of overtime games since this 1994 setup was implemented, the team that wins the coin toss (and therefore ALWAYS chooses the ball) has won the game 60% of the time. This stat was enough to convince NFL franchise owners that the coin toss was unfairly affecting the outcomes of games. Along with Minnesota's overtime loss this past January to the New Orleans Saints, it was enough to push for a vote. The Vikings famously lost to the Saints when Favre went all Favre on us and tossed an interception on the game-sealing drive. The pick led to overtime where the Saints won the toss, drove downfield and kicked a fieldgoal.

The new rule passed votes by a 28-4 margin, it only needed 24 votes to pass. The new rule states that any overtime in the playoffs, the cointoss-losing team will get an opportunity to possess the ball unless the other team scores a touchdown. In other words, a team that takes the ball first, must score a TD to end the game. If they only score a fieldgoal, the opponent will get a possession to match or beat that score. It's a good start, but once again, it's only during the playoffs, and only if the team that wins the coin toss doesn't score a TD.

"Modified sudden death is an opportunity to make a pretty good rule ... even better," said Atlanta Falcons president Rich McKay, co-chairman of the competition committee. "Statistically, it needed to change. It wasn't producing the fairest result."

Let the Tournament Begin! Let Jay's Money Fritter Away!

March is here and with it comes the NCAA tournament of 64 division one basketball teams, one of the most entertaining single-eliminations events on TV. And with the start of the tournament comes my annual giving-away of $25-50 dollars of hard earned money to any one of a number of non-college-basketball fan-girls who pick winners based upon:

1) No upsets at all - exactly as they're seeded

2) Mascots and colors

3) That totally cute power forward

4) My Boyfriend's friend who totally knows like everything about basketball

I just give my money away to them every year like I'm senile and yet I do it year after year. Is it satisfying to lead all the way until the final four and then watch my bracket nosedive like Gigli at the box office? Doesn't the remorse of being constantly beaten by a slew of girlfriends and sisters in my friends pool ever set in? Apparently not as I've filled out another four brackets for 2010... and I'm willing to bet you have too.

Like gluttons for punishment we fork over wads of cash each year only to watch that same cash be used for a new pair of boots at DSW three weeks later by Amanda or Tiffany or Claudia who pulled out the victory when all four number one seeds progress to the final four. And I, thinking I'm totally clever to pick these sneaky, unpredicted upsets am left wondering where it all went wrong.

That being said, the tournament is entertaining as hell. So is the Frozen four of college ice hockey. We all wish someday that college football will realize that.

This year, Barack Obama, undeniably our most basketball-literate president, has released his bracket with Kansas taking the title from Kentucky. He didn't stray off the beaten path much in predicting all one and two seeds from advancing to the elite 8 except Georgetown - a little DC hometown favoritism? I actually like Georgetown to win it all in one of my own brackets - and have them in the final four in two others. But in the end, I actually think Duke is my favorite this year. Coach K finally has some size to go with that unrelenting effort - maybe that's just enough to push them over the top.

You can see Barack's bracket here.

Backham the Latest in a String of Rough Luck For England

England is football crazy, and they always show up as a high favorite to win the World Cup. But the fact is they haven't won it since 1966. This year's squad, led by Fabio Capello, is facing an array of setbacks and infighting that could lead to an eventual poor showing in South Africa. David Beckham tore his left achilles tendon in the closing minutes of AC Milan's 1-0 victory over Chievo. John Terry was stripped of his captain's band after sleeping with Wayne Bridge's ex-wife. left-back Ashley Cole broke his ankle and is out for the world cup - and was sleeping with a bunch of hoes, cheating on his smoking hot wife, Cheryl Cole. And now Wayne Bridge doesn't want to fill that left-back position seeing as how he'd have to play along side John Terry.

England fans are flustered to say the least. All of the infidelity and unexpected injury means that Capello will be very deep at some positions and extremely thin at others. Ashley Cole gets a double heaping of misfortune with his injury PLUS banging lots of women because he was apparently tired of Cheryl... what an idiot. All the trouble in the defense means that England is calling up young, untested players to fill in for the quality standards that are now out. Beckham's injury means that England loses their experienced leadership and expert free kick taker.

Add all this to the exceptional pressure of playing for England and all the rabid fans that expect to win everytime out and you've got a pressure cooker waiting to burst. While forwards like Wayne Rooney, Jermaine Defoe, Peter Crouch, Emilr Hesky, and Darren Bent mean England has a deep pool of talent, the lack of recognizeable defensemen is worrying. Players like Sunderland's Shawcross are getting called up with only several months left before the World Cup.

I love watching England play, but when they meet the USA in their first game in South Africa, I believe that the US has a legitimate chance to upset the Three Lions. Disarray and lack of team cohesiveness could lead England to make mistakes of communication and concentration. If the US were to win, England would be in outrage - even if they still end up getting out of the group stages. For now, Capello will try to work with what he's got too little of - defenders/holding midfielders - and pare down what he's got too much of - strikers and wingers.

Conan O'Brien's Tour Shows His Character

Conan O'Brien is going on tour this summer, performing in 30 cities across the US from April through June - and he's not going to earn one cent from it. Conan's "Legally Prohibited From Being Funny on Television" Tour is being put on by all former staff of his Late Night gig - including the band and Andy Richter. Since Conan got a nice little $32.5 million severance package from NBC, he decided the money should all go to his staff who had uprooted families and moved corss-country with him to put on the show.

Sources said that the whole reason for the tour is so that O'Brien can employ his former Tonight Show staff. Roughly 40 members of Conan's production team, band, and operations staff have been hired on to the tour. I think that is a really good thing for him to do for his people - and for the fans who have to go without their Conan fix during his absence.

Part of the negotiation with NBC paid several million out to the staff, somewhere in the neighborhood of $18 million to be split by his whole staff, but this tour will give them steady jobs and a good income throughout the summer. I'm definitely a Conan fan, and I only wish I could be here to see him perform with the band at Mackey auditorium on Univ of Colorado's campus, May 9th. I hope some of you out there have gotten ahold of tickets!

Ok Go Makes Sweet Music Videos

I have a soft spot for Ok Go because the founding members met while attending Interlochen Arts Camp, where I myself am a 4 year alumnus. The band's singer, Damian Kulash, met bassist Tim Nordwind at the camp when they were 11 - the same age that I started going there for my summers. Make all the "this one time, at band camp" jokes you'd like, but Interlochen is amazing and I'll never forget my time there. It's produced famous alumni in all walks of the entertainment world including Ed Helms, Jewel, Ben Foster, Norah Jones, Josh Groban, and Felicity Huffman.

Anyway, OK Go has had it's share of hits including Get Over It, Here it Goes Again, and This Too Shall Pass - the videos to the later two I've linked below. They always seem to come up with zany ideas and make their videos in a "single shot". This means they must perform the entire video on a single cut with no breaks. Lately they caught people's attention with the Rube Goldberg-esque machine in a State Farm sponsored video for This Too Shall Pass. It kind of one-upped their previous video for the song in which they used a marching band to play out the song in one clip.

As they are Interlochen alumni, I've got to assume that they went on to be in their school's marching bands back home. It makes perfect sense then that they use a marching band in one of their videos - again, soft spot as I played sax and clarinet in both high school and college band. Watch the marching band one first, then hear the studio cut of the song in the Rube Goldberg version - entertaining all around! Their videos are refreshing when compared to the typical videos of today which are glossy and over-produced, but largely unengaging and unentertaining.

This Too Shall Pass (Marching Band) - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UJKythlXAIY

This Too Shall Pass (Machine):

Here It Goes Again: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dTAAsCNK7RA

Happy Birthday Chuck Norris, You're 70 and Can Destroy Anyone

Chuck Norris was born this day in 1940, making him way older than anybody thought he was. At 70 he will be able to exercise his right to early bird specials, priority seating on the bus, and social security. By that I mean he will be serviced by a flock of hand maidens each morning, he will take your seat on the bus by force, and he'll kick anyone's ass that messes with the USA - social security, bitch!

Chuck Norris is of course, the subject of a internet fad that cropped up in 2005 involving Chuck and incredible feats of strength and awesomeness. This could have been brought on by Conan O'Brien's introduction of the Walker Texas Ranger Lever on his show, Late Night. Conan would keep the lever by his desk and simply pull it to play a 5-second clip of WTR featuring Chuck Norris' amazing feats like shooting a man out of a helicopter with a snub-nosed pistol, destroying 6 bad guys single-handedly, or saving falling babies from burning buildings.

Norris served in the US Air Force before beginning his martial arts movie and television career. He has kicked ass on all continents, indiscriminantly and thoroughly. He starred with Bruce Lee in Way of the Dragon, also kicking lots of ass. He then went on to police all of Texas by himself and sweep Christie Brinkly off her feet with his Total Gym machine. So here's to you, Chuck Norris, happy 70th birthday. You still have the vitality of three twenty year olds, so keep on roudhouse kicking! And Now, some of my favorite Chuck Norris Jokes:

It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.

Chuck Norris got his driver's license at age 16. Seconds.

Chuck Norris is a vegetarian... meaning he does not eat animals until he first puts them into a vegetative state with his fists.

Chuck Norris doesn't own a microwave or oven, because revenge is a dish best served cold.

Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

Chuck Norris knows where Carmen Sandiego is.

Chuck Norris doesn't see dead people. He makes people dead.

Feel the Rhythm, Feel the Rhyme, Get on Up! It's...Iditarod Time?

You know they can't believe, Jamaica, we have a dogsled team!

Newton Marshall is a former Jamaican tour guide turned dogsled racer. He is the first Jamaican musher to compete in Alaska's Iditarod - a dogsled race of over 1,100 miles across the frozen plains of Alaska that starts in Anchorage. He's no slouch either; he is the first Jamaican to ever finish the 1,000 mile Yukon Quest dogsled race, coming in 13th out of 29. Finishing in the top half is spectacular for Newton when most rookies don't even complete the race at all.

Marshall trained in Jamaica using a sled with wheels on the bottom and mutts borrowed from the Jamaica Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals. Now, with sponsorship backing from (of all people) Jimmy Buffett and his Margaritaville restaurant chain, he's got a team of the best bred dogs in the business and has been training in Alaska with some of the best coaches in the world.

"I thought from the beginning it was just very cool what he was doing," Buffett said. "I thought it was so far out there, but it made people smile when they heard about it." Jimmy met Marshall when Marshall worked for a tour company owned by Buffet's friend. Jimmy immidiately toked some reefer and decided to become Newton's number one sponsor. Jimmy Buffet inexplicably leads probably the most relaxed, filthy-stinking-rich life of all time. Newton Marshall as a result gets to dogsled and have all the tequilla he can drink.

The Iditarod is a whole different game from a wheeled sled being pulled by stray dogs. It's dogsledding's world cup, a race over 1,100 miles and has over 70 mushers, all of whom are experienced professionals. And if you screw up there is no slow clap from onlooking fans out in the wilderness by yourself. Newton says he's worried about the cold because he got a bit of frostbite on his nose during the last race.

Read more here.

Whitehouse Loses Beer/Jersey Bet With Whatever House Canadians Are Ruled From

President Barack Obama and Whitehouse Press Secretary Robert Gibbs have lost a bet to their Canadian counterparts, Prime Minister Stephen Harper and Spokesman Dimitri Soudas. Obama is having a 24-pack of Molson Canadian to Harper's office while Gibbs has to run a press conference while wearing a bright red Canadian hockey jersey, complete with maple leaf.

Pretty funny stuff from our nations' collective leadership. It's good to see that they've retained a sense of humor in all that's going on athletically, economically, and politically. When asked about the beer delivery, Gibbs responded "We are working on the delivery." Had Obama won, Harper would have had to deliver 24 American beers to 1600 Pennsylvania Ave.

Worse is the bed that Robert Gibbs made for himself. He first bet Soudas that the US women would beat the Canadian women; loser has to wear an opponents jersey to an off-camera press meeting. After losing, Gibbs stepped his game up and offered a double down on the US men to beat Canada. This time the loser would have to do an entire on-camera press conference in the opposing country's jersey. "I'll be getting him the jersey over the next couple of days," Soudas said Monday afternoon. Note: this is not what Gibbs will look like.