January 13, 2010

Fall Out Boy Surprised By How Quickly Lane Kiffin Sells Out

Lane Kiffin bolted seemingly overnight from Rocky Top Tennessee to the sunny beaches of Southern California after only one season at the Volunteers' head coach. When reached for comment, Pete wentz said, "Holy shit that was a fast sell out, I've been around a lot of sellouts but have never seen anything like that. He moved with incredible speed, faster than that time Gary Coleman and I went to In-n-Out Burger."

Lane Kiffin left the Volunteers after a 7-6 season in which he belittled pretty much everyone in the SEC and called recruits that chose Florida over him 'future gas pumpers'. He did take Tennessee to a bowl game, but the season was pock marked with embarassing losses and NCAA violations. Kiffin coached a season and a half with the Raiders before coming to Old Rocky Top, but before Oakland had served 6 years under Pete Carroll at USC.

Lane started out as the wide receivers coach before graduating to the offensive coordinator role. He was there for both of USC's national championships and is a clear disciple of Carroll; so not the worst choice for a replacement. Don't tell that to the Volunteers though, they are outraged in Orange country - writing obscenities all over their campus and organizing marches and rallies pretty much to elaborate upon those written obscenities. Kiffin will bring his father and defensive coordinator, Monte Kiffin, and assistant head coach and recruiting coordinator Ed Orgeron to Southern California with him - kicking Tennessee even further while they are down.

I think the abandonment part of UofT is a pretty dick move by Kiffin, but for USC I believe it's a great hire. He's a Carroll student who is young and energetic and anxious to get wins. Of course being a unbiased onlooker, I don't feel the sting of betrail or the joy of victory for either side. In the end USC comes out on top and Tennessee is looking for a true coach to take them back to SEC glory - one who won't bail after less than a year this time around. ESPN article here.

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